So for the most part I have been feeling great. I almost wish I wasn't feeling so great so that my anxious mind could rest a little easier *remind me of this in a few weeks when my head is stuck neck deep in a toilet*

Here is what I have been feeling so far

1. I am rockin some serious bloat, as I wrote before I had this for about a week *maybe more* prior to my BFP and was one of the only indicators that I might actually be knocked up this time. I mean it's serious people. After about 5pm Mama is having to unbutton her jeans or change into sweatpants. Hubs says we better start telling people soon since I look 3 months pregnant or just stop leaving the house in the evening *isn't he sweet? :)*

2. I have to pee all the time, this started almost immediatly. I am usually up atleast once at night too which never used to happen.

3. I have had some lower abdominal cramping and lower back pain

4. The boobs just started hurting last week, its not horrible but it's definitely noticable and worse at night without a bra. And I defintely have the blue veiny mappings going on.... so hot I tell you

5. I have started to feel a little queasy, mostly when I have an empty stomach and usually my raging appetite wont let me go more then a few hours without chowing down.

Thats it for now. We have told a few of our closest friends and our immediate family but I think we will hold off on telling anyone else until after my first appointment. Oh and my boss knows.

Ok so let me try to fill you in on a few details since yall have been so patient. First off thank you so much for your sweet comments, it still hasn't totally hit me that this is for real, it still seems fake.

 

Saturday, May 9th (the day before Mothers day) I would take a test when I woke up. I don't really know why I decided to take a test, I guess just because I knew I would want to test on Mothers day and I really didn't want to deal with the dissapointment of seeing a BFN again on Mother's day, so i thought I would get the whole horrible thing over with, feel bad for myself and then get over it... all in time to celebrate MD with my own mom. So I took a dollar store test and the control line came up pretty much right away, I figured that was that and started brushing my teeth, but when I looked over again there was a very faint pink line. It was definitely there ( I mean I saw it out of the corner of my eye) but it wasn't glaringly positive. So I took it downstairs to show the man and he said he wasn't very convinced. I told him I thought any kind of line was a good sign but I told him I'd probably just try again in a day or so. And then we went the rest of the day without another word about it (can you believe that?!?!) But all of you profecient POS people know you can't just stop the urge especially when you think you saw a faint line. So I jumped to the bigger guns and peed on an EPT right before I went to work (I was working the night shift) and sure enough those two beautiful pink lines came up right away!!! I could not believe it. I ran downstairs and told the skeptical man that it was time to get excited!!

The whole thing was so surreal and so lame since I had to go to work for 13hrs 1o minutes after finding out that I was finally going to be a mom but thats life right. I mean after you've been trying forever you kind of know you aren't going to have the magic cute scenario of surprising your husband with the big news. So we laughed and hugged and carried on and then I went to work! haha

I'll tell you how we told everyone next time, for now I have to go stuff my face, something that I do about every 2hrs now :)

Sorry to leave you all hanging... me and my bloated self will be back to post the whole story soon I promise. Thanks for all the congrats. Keep praying for me and the little bean. Like a lot of you have mentioned the worry doesn't end when you finally get knocked up. The enemy is trying hard to steal my joy and replace it with worrying.

We bought the bibs

This time last year

This time last year I was waiting for my period to come and thinking how fun it would be to be able to tell my parents we were pregnant on Mothers Day (haven't we all been there?) what a great present that would be. Last year on Mothers day I took a pregnancy test and it was negative, I then proceeded to be 5 days late and then AF had the decency to show her ugly face. This Mothers Day I am due to get my period, that day.... sometimes life is cruel. And I don't know which would be worse, if she shows on Mothers Day or she shows late. Because I dont think I can go the whole day waiting and hoping and dreaming only for her to show on Monday. But I just don't know if on Mothers day of all days I have the strength and energy to deal with another failed month.

Or maybe I'll have to go out and buy that "I love my Grandma" bib after all.... I am rocking some serious bloat

The HSG went great, well as great as those things can go I guess. It really wasn't bad at all, not nearly as bad as I had thought it might be or I had read it might be. The worst part was getting the speculum in place and the catheter inserted. The test showed nice clear tubes and a perfectly fine uterus! There is no way to tell if my tubes were previously blocked and the pressure of the dye unblocked them or if they have always been clear but whichever they are open for business now! I am hoping maybe they were blocked and this was the key. I have had some mild cramping over the last day or so and some discharge but otherwise I'd say the HSG was a walk in the park.

In other news I got the bill for my bloodwork.... $350!! I had a minor freak out and am trying not to worry about it until I call them on Monday, there has to be some mistake, can that really be true? Dear Lord I hope not. If thats how much two tubes of blood cost what in the word is my HSG going to cost. We are going to be so broke. But my dear calm husband said "don't worry about it, if you get pregnant after this will it be worth it?" to which I said "of course" but how about we get pregnant and have some money left over? No? It doesn't work that way? So please pray it was an oops on the insurance companies part, oh and while you're talking to the big guy how about a little bit of love for my uterus this month.

HSG

So after a big time fiasco I am going in for my HSG tomorrow. Despite all the headache (more about that in a minute) it is ending up working out perfectly, I was able to get someone to cover the last part of my shift for me and the appointment is right in the same building and I'll have the evening and part of the morning on Saturday to recover should it be painful. I have heard mixed reviews on the amount of crampiness and the duration of the discomfort but I am figuring I have got to have had periods that were worse then it will be.

So day 27, otherwise known as the day I have been getting my period on for the last oh I don't know 8 months in a row was on Sunday. This put me in line to have the HSG somewhere between Thursday and Monday (which kind of stinks since two of those days fall on the weekend) Monday was out because I had to work all day and could not find anyone to switch with me, so that left Thursday and Friday. Well Sunday my period did not come, good news when you are TTC bad news when you get a BFN. So I was frustrated since then that took Thursday out of the running and I am going out of town on Tuesday so that only left Friday IF I got my period Monday. Well you probably see where this is going, Monday comes and still no sign of AF. I am starting to panic thinking I am not going to get in for the test before I have to go out of town and another month would be wasted. So Monday afternoon I get a little spotting and think "oh good it should be here any minute" and I call to schedule the HSG telling the lady that today was day 1, she goes ahead and schedules me for Friday (which works great) well then I don't end up getting my period and no more spotting. Tuesday- nothing. So by lunch time Tuesday I am starting to really panic thinking 1. I am not going to be able to do the test and 2. I am going to have to call and tell the lady I tried to be sneaky to get in on time and it totally back fired or 3. by some miracle I really am pregnant and won't even need the test (by far the most appealing of the three) but Tuesday afternoon AF finally showed. So technically tomorrow is day 4 and the test is supposed to be between day 5 and 10 but that's really only to make sure you aren't pregnant and you haven't ovulated and I am covered on all accounts. Plus I am already done bleeding so I am not even going to tell them about it. Wish me luck!!